Browsing in my local second hand store yesterday on my lunch hour, I came across something that nearly made me shit my pants. standing upright in the glass display case with all the other Nintendo games was a black cart that looked a little different. Being a seasoned retro gamer, my mind jumped immediately to three possibilities, before even reading the label:
1) It’s a Tengen cart – Some gooders exist among Tengen NES carts, Tetris and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom come to mind
2) it’s a pirate cart – Again some real treasures can be had here. But the problem with pirates is that the sheer number of variations make telling the good from the ugly almost impossible without actually popping the game in.
3) it’s an unlicensed cart – Here’s where the real gold can be found. Sure it could be a turkey like F-15 City War, but it could also be collecting gold like an upside down label Captain Comic, or a black Castle of Deceit. It could also be the game that was staring me in the face, not 24 hours ago:
HOLY BALLS! IT’S KING NEPTUNE’S ADVENTURE!
This is a hell of a find! Surely the pricer in the second hand store would have gone on Ebay before pricing any game that they put out. But no, apparently this particular store must check the Digital Press online rarity guide, where this game is woefully and tragically mispriced at $10 loose. Which, by the way, is so unbelievably out of touch with reality it’s insane, but I digress. No, I ended up paying $7.95 for this gem, which actually kind of disappointed me. It would be a better story if I could say I found it for a $1.49 at the Salvation Army, which is exactly the circumstance under which I found my Super Mario RPG a couple summers back. Not that I am complaining! Not at all, I am super psyched to have found this diamond, and in the wild no less. I guess my theory holds true!
So I pop this game into my NES last night, and surprise, surprise; it fucking sucks. Bad. The worst part is, is that a nautical themed Duck Tales-ish game where you collect treasures and traverse the ocean could be, if done properly, an amazing experience. But as it stands, the game is bogged down by terrible control, lackluster graphics, and shoddy music. But who ever wanted this game for the actual game play, anyway?
Anyway, I am currently offering this for sale, or trade. Take a look at my trades list. And whatever you do, don’t offer me $10…